28 May 2009

Watched

Honestly i have never given much thought to skin color, besides being a tiny bit jealous of those blessed with a perma-tan... i have never thought less of anybody with a different skin color, nor have I thought any more of anybody with a particular skin color, perhaps it's because i was born and raised in the U.S. which has many mixed races, or perhaps it is because of the way i was raised, maybe it's just the way I am. I mean, i know that some people are racist, and I know that some people have never seen a black person, or a white person, or a red person, or a pink person, or a green person for that matter before. But seriously, we all know that skin color differences exist, why do people make a big deal out of it. We are still all human, we still all have individual ideas, nobody is smarter, and for that matter more dumb depending on the color of their skin.

I bring this issue of skin color up because frankly, it's really bothering me right now. As most of you have probably gathered from the fact that I am in Africa, people with white skin are few and far between, most days i don't see any white people at all, it doesn't bother me of course, as i stated before I hardly even notice skin color, what bothers me is the way most people here react to me, the Mzungu.

Children are adorable, cute, and ignorant. When i pass children are subject to doing many things, most often they yell the statement 'how are you!' to my back, too shy to actually talk to me. Some with wave and speak the statement, in hopes i will wave back, some just yell 'Mzungu,' or 'white person,' I have even had groups of children follow me as far as the end of the street, and a few even come just to hold my hand. I don't mind, like I said it is all in innocence and rather cute.

Women, for the most part, ignore me, if they are with children they will whisper 'how are you' in their little ears, and if they are alone the most they will ever do is stare from a distance. but like i said, they are quite good at ignoring me...they aren't rude and if i talk to them they will talk to me, Sister Caroline just watches out for me...in a sentence they treat me just like anyone else...which suits me just fine.

now Men, men are what bother me most here. not ALL of them, but most of them...as i pass they act just as children, they yell out 'how are you' and 'mzungu' some just want to see how i react, some really do want to talk to me...the difference between the Men and the Children is this...

To the children i am the exotic reptile on display, they want to look at me, and watch me, some are even brave enough to pet me...which is fine with me, they are adorable and what do I expect, i am the first 'one of my kind' that they have ever seen...it's a different story with the men, to them i am the game animal that they are just dying to catch, kill, and reap the reward. As they yell to me, i try not to take notice, look straight ahead and walk quickly. But if i do happen to be caught off guard and take a glance, the look in their eyes is enough for me to grimace, snap my head back to the road, and walk a little faster.

...as a side note, don't worry about me, i'm safe and i am well, nobody will do anything to me, i am protected and the spirit is always with me...

also here, in general, white skin means lots of money. i know that yes, i probably have more money than the average joe here, but seriously? i wish white skin meant money! Last week a woman asked the person accompanying me if he could ask me for 50 shillings so that she could get home. now, 50 shillings is not much at all, but it's not like i have a never-ending supply of money. the U.S. may be richer, but comparatively it is also more expensive to live there and you have to work just as hard to survive.

I don't want to sound like I am complaining, because I'm not, yes I do look forward to the day two weeks from now which I can walk around a city and not be looked at, yelled at, or watched because of the way I was born. I can tell you it has opened my eyes a lot to the prejudice's that exist in the world and i can tell you now that I don't think i have ever made any conclusions based on the way people naturally look, but even so i will be more careful never to ever make these conclusions...if you ever EVER catch me doing it i give you permission, no, a command, to shortly slap me and give me a reproach ( I will do the same for/to you)...please and thank you

3 comments:

Diana said...

We never question the luxury that we are born to. You have lived a somewhat sheltered life and accepted all people as God's children. How difficult for those of His children who have had to live with bias, prejudice, condemnation and rage simply for the color or race they were born to. You have had a taste and found it bitter. You will be a better person for it. I too, do not see color as a definition but usually as a variety. I love the infinite variety of God's children. I love that in you also.

Hernan+ said...

I see colors... Mzungu!!!!

PappaSistas said...

Thanks for this post. You are learning so much, and not all of it is happiness and sunshine. We were blessed to come from such a family and situation that these behaviors are surprising and eye-opening to you. As mom pointed out in her post "I love the infinite variety of God's children" But just because we don't see race as an issue and dividing line between people, it doesn't mean that those lines and prejudices don't exist. They just don't exist in us, and for that I am so grateful.

LOVE YOU!
D